Chosen.

Being CHOSEN.

The idea of being chosen might bring up really wonderful memories, or it might bring back a solid mixture of bad memories.  I remember being chosen on teams during recess or P.E. that I really didn't want to be a part of.  I remember being chosen to do several jobs that I severely didn't want to do.  I remember being chosen to go FIRST on a class discussion that I was clueless on (NOT a good memory!).  However, I also remember being chosen to be part of groups that excited me and got me prepared for my future in college and thereafter.  I remember being chosen because of votes being tallied and feeling accepted and respected.   Being chosen in either of those dynamics can host a lot of different emotions, because, frankly, what if we don't WANT to be chosen for the job that is being asked of us?

You might know this, but a long time ago, a young girl named Mary, was chosen.  She was chosen for a divine job that carried the hope of the human race and the hope of the world.  A job that would change history and people's lives forever.  A job that gave birth to reckless grace and beautiful, unthinkable forgiveness.  A job that carried so much weight and scrutiny that it was almost unbearable.  A job that became the greatest story every told: The Birth of Jesus.

I'm a Christmas lover.  Everything about it I love, but now as the season is coming to the day it is mostly about, I've been pulled to scripture more than ever before.  This Christmas season, Mary has captured my heart, so, I figured why not do a little studying on this strong and courageous woman of The Lord.

Life changed for Mary when she was a teenager; when the angel Gabriel came to visit her to tell her the news that she was to conceive a son (Luke 1:31).  She might have been about 13 years old, which in those times, was the age to get engaged and to be married.  She was of nobility, in the lineage of King David, but even so, her family was poor due to Israel's captivity.  I love that part, personally.  Think of it: normal, average, a family just trying to make it from day to day.  The one girl that probably wouldn't have been thought of in society to take on such a job as to bring forth The Messiah to this world.

While she and other girls then were raised to take care of the home and learn duties to nurture a family, she was rare in her strength, obedience, and wisdom.  She was rare in the fact that she was incredibly rooted and had been trained in scripture.  The Bible is faithful to show us her wisdom and faithfulness in Luke 1:46-56: The Song of Mary.   She truly knew the Lord and trusted in His promises, "And holy is His name. And His mercy is on those who fear Him," (Luke 1:50).  The Lord knew that He needed someone who could refer to the scriptures for guidance, confidence, reassurance, and something to hold on to while things got rough. The Lord, simply, looks at the heart.  He knew the heart of Mary, and Mary had an obedient spirit who loved God deeply.

In listening to the birth story of Jesus in church and in growing up, I always remember seeing Mary as this meek and mild young girl who probably said yes at the drop of a hat.  However, with more studying, I believe that couldn't have been further from the truth.  Mary was incredibly courageous , yet troubled with Gabriel's message, "But when she saw him, she was troubled at his saying," Luke 1:29.  She was troubled! Well, yes, I imagine so!  If it were me, I would have most likely run off, disregarded the entire transaction, pretended it didn't happen, and would try to get on with my normal, everyday life.  Mary though, even as she was troubled, didn't run.  She stayed and listened; then, responded, "May it be done to me according to your word," Luke 1:38.

Rare strength and obedience.

She was that faithful.  She was so faithful that she looked that angel in the eyes, despite her longing to run in the other direction, and said, "YES".  If that's not strength, I don't know what is.

I'm the type of person that tries to put myself in other's shoes as much as I can.  How do they feel?  What is it like?  Do they hurt?  Do they fear?  In short: Are they okay?? I have tried to put myself in Mary's shoes several times and I can only imagine the shunning and the suffering that followed because of her obedience.  An unwed mother, a dishonor to her family, and unbeknownst to her, a future that carried her 90 miles to Bethlehem to give birth in a stable to her first born who she would later watch get cruelly murdered on a cross at 34 years of age.

Rare strength and obedience?  I think so.

What also catches me at a loss is the fact that Mary was the only one that saw Jesus take His first AND last breath of life.  When I actually process that Biblical fact, tears immediately well and I almost become nauseous, but yet, at the same time so very grateful and humbled.

Not only was Mary chosen to carry the hope of the world, she was chosen to raise Him as well.  Let us not forget that.  Her job wasn't over when He cried His first cry.  Even after Jesus' death, she continues!  It shows us in Acts 1:14 that her following and love for the Lord stayed strong as she attended the prayer meeting in the Upper Room, "These all continued with one accord in prayer and supplication with the women and Mary, the mother of Jesus, and with His brothers."  This is, what I would call, devout following.

Edith Deen, author of All of the Women of the Bible, said it best, "Though she never traveled farther than from Palestine to Egypt, and then by donkey, her story still travels to the farthest corners of the Earth."

So, what's the point in me summarizing where it began with Mary?  I'll tell you.

What job have you been called to?  What is that one job that you feel God has laid upon you? Is it a dream?  Is it a shove from The Holy Spirit?  Is it that one feeling of, "I need to do that, but I am scared to…"?  Is it as simple as making a change in your daily life?  Or is it as hard as accepting a job that you don't want to take responsibility for at this time in your life?  And more importantly, do you want to run in the other direction?

I can bet your bottom dollar Mary wanted to run.  But because of her faith, she listened and said yes.   Because of that one simple "yes", she has reached thousands upon thousands with her story of sacrifice and submission in bringing The Messiah, the hope of all nations, into this world.

I am so thankful for Mary's yes.  I'm so thankful that God chose her to show us how a normal girl who loves the Lord can make such a life altering difference in this world.

My prayer is when God derails our worldly plan, and chooses us for 'that' job, whatever job that happens to be, that we will not run.  My prayer is that we will plant our feet firmly in the ground and in scripture, and boldly say, "let it be to me, according to Your word."

Merry, MERRY Christmas to you and yours this season!

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5 Reasons Adults Should Keep Dreaming

Out of the 15 seasons of American Idol, only one winner went past the 29 year old mark.  Season 14, the winner was 30.  Whew!  Over the hill, much?!?

Obviously, I am a huge fan of kids.  I am an elementary teacher, for goodness sakes.   I love young kids; they literally have the world at their fingertips.  They can choose whatever they want to be, how they want to make a difference; their brains are so open and ready for creativity! Watching kids learn and think are one of my most favorite things.  They are our future generation and the ones that will end up running the world one day when we're REALLY over the hill.  They have the potential to change the world.

And so do we.

"WE" being the adults in the world.  We are living in a society surrounded by the 15, 16, and 17 year olds that succeed on the main stage by furiously following their dreams.  While we should absolutely and 100% support and applaud them, we cannot count ourselves out of the game.

My Coach and I were sitting in church recently and the youth pastor was talking about some new developments and visions within the youth.  He had sectioned off the groups by ages; I don't remember the exact titles he had for each group, but basically you have the young ones, the teenagers, then the millennial generation somewhat paired with the young adults with young kids.  After that I somewhat tuned out because all I heard was the ceiling:  30 or 32 I think?? 34?? I can't even remember the cutoff! All I DO remember is that I wasn't within the limit!

I thought for a split second that there was a mistake or maybe I wasn't understanding correctly.  No joke.  Dead serious here, I had to sit and think a minute.  I scanned the people there and looked for that distinction.  Where were the young adults?  And where were the older ones? Which one was I a part of? And then, it dawned on me.  Have I really turned the curve from young adult into midlifehood? Is that what you call it? Am I mid-lifer? What group am I in?  The mid-life crisis people? No thanks.

Whatever group I am currently linked to, in the pattern of me being completely honest, I have caught myself in the recent past saying in response to my own thoughts, "Well, it's okay..that's just how it is."  OR…"Well, my time is over in that department, I need to 'adult' and grow up," and so on.   You know what I'm talking about. You know those thoughts whether you want to admit it or not.

I'm having trouble with that whole entire mindset.  I'm a wife.  I'm a mom.  I'm a teacher. I wear a lot of hats.  I try to manage all of those hats to the absolute best of my ability.

But, here's the thing, I'm not here to only manage them.  God does not want me to merely manage life.  And to add, I'm also not gone off of this Earth, so why in the WORLD would I let any dream that I had when I was 15, 18, 21, 23…die off just because I am no longer in the young adults club?

I just finished the book "IF" by Mark Batterson.  It is stinkin' amazing.  The way Mark Batterson writes is right up my alley.  In coach's wife fashion, I will explain; he throws plenty of fastballs and change ups, but then will throw you a curveball that makes you stop in your reading tracks.  It's a little leadership, a little motivation, a little bit real-life stuff, all weaved in and based in Scripture.  Romans 8, to be exact.

He talks about failures…he talks about redemption…he talks about blooming where you are planted.  It's not a feel-good book on dreaming big and wishing upon a star.  Oh no.  I look at it as a training book on your mindset, trusting God, and remembering that "IF" God is for us, then who can be against us??

One line he writes that I want everyone who thinks their time is over to hear: "It's never too late to become who you might have been."

PERIOD.

Why should adults keep dreaming?  I've got some reasons on why you should...

1. Our Kids Are Watching.
Do I really need to say more?  If not anything else, I want my own children to be inspired by me!  In no way shape or form do I want my children to believe that at a certain point, life is about predictability, being stressed, paying bills, and living life mundane because their 'time' is over.  I mean, yes, life is busy, there are schedules to maintain, and responsibility is obviously something they should never disregard; however, we can absolutely show them that having goals and dreaming big can be paired very well with the responsibilities of being an adult.  After all, we raise our kids by how we live. 

2. You're Alive. 
If you are reading this, you are still here. And by you being HERE, means God has so much more left in store for you.  What is it?  What is that? Is it to go through the daily grind? Wake up, do life, go to bed? No way.

3. Kingdom Work. 
That talent?  That urge in your belly?  That one thing that inspires you and makes your heart beat faster?  It's God's.  And it is made to move forcefully in and for His Kingdom.   The impact that you have, is just as powerful as the impact a young child has with wild and crazy dreams.  We just aren't as apt to go for it.  We aren't elementary, middle, or high school students.  But that urge and that tick, is still there for a reason.  Do you think that's a coincidence?

4. Protecting Your Identity
The enemy wants to come in and tell you as many lies as possible to derail you from that one step forward into what God has created you to be.  He wants to persuade you with all the his might to get you second guessing your potential.  He would love nothing more than to make you feel like you are too old to accomplish anything worthwhile.  As a matter of fact, he wants to "steal, kill, and destroy" (John 10:10).  He will feed you everything and anything to destroy your dreams.  Don't let him.  Protect your identity.  Hold your thoughts captive and dedicate them to The Lord.

5.  For Others 
Why do people dream and want to be successful?  I want to hope and say that human nature's priority, when it comes to dreams, isn't to become rich and powerful, but to make a positive impact on others.  Others being impacted by what you have accomplished and the footprint you leave on society is why we dream.  Seeing people's lives changed by your story, from all your efforts, sweat, and tears, is what people long for; there's nothing better.   It is more fulfilling than the dollars in the bank and the status and title on a piece of paper.  I believe that God purposely designed us that way.


I've got many goals and dreams that are written in a journal, and I have a rule of following 3 prerequisite questions to make sure they are God-sized dreams and goals.  Do they align with Scripture?  Is it good for my family?  Will it advance His Kingdom?  If the answer is yes, I keep on truckin'.  While not all have been reached, and while I have failed miserably with several and flat on my face with some, I won't stop or give up on those goals and dreams.  I don't want society telling me I'm too old, past my prime, or have not the ability to follow through.  We would call that a non-truth, friends. We can count on Philippians 1:6 to prove that thought process wrong: "being confident of this, that He who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus."

35, 40, 65, or 80.  Whatever the age, I choose to keep on dreaming and leave it all on the field for the glory of Him who has created me.

Be Blessed my dear friends, and keep on dreaming.

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When You Don't Know How To Swim

Little Spitfire took swimming lessons a couple of weeks ago and my goodness, if you want entertainment, that is IT.  It and a bag of chips, my friends.  To ALL of our surprise, she didn't yell and scream not once about going in the water.

She jumped right on in.  Right to the step.  Splashing, laughing, excited to get started.   She had a great first day.  I mean, awesome.  She listened to everything her teachers said.  They had an incredibly wonderful lead into making her do things (never underestimate the power of a swim teacher!).  We were all pretty excited when we left. As a matter of fact, I left thinking, "my gosh, I have an Olympic swimmer on my hands. I better get prepared for this wonderful swimming future we have!"

The next day went on without a hitch.  The next, even better.  We were SWIMMING, y'all!  I thought  for once, Little Girl didn't do what she usually does. This was actually pretty darn easy.  Where was my easy button?  Apparently, the many times of me pushing it, it finally stuck.

Things were safe.  They were well led. There were plenty of baby steps, yet big steps all wrapped into one.  It was good.  Really good.

Oh, but wait.  The story doesn't end there.  Envision this:  The last day was the day she was to swim the entire length of the pool…from the diving board.  It sounds daunting, but the thing is, with guidance, she had done it the day before.  This fateful last day, she decided to have a full blown, wide-eyed, conniption FIT.   Full blown!

Y'all.  The last day of the two week lessons and girl child decides to throw a MIGHTY fit.  One that drags on into the next kids' lessons.  **Sidenote: If that mom is reading this, I totally owe you a lesson.**  I was not only livid but absolutely confused.  I will say, however, I wasn't the least bit surprised with her behavior.

You see, she had felt the feeling of panic the day before, but her teacher was there for her and helped her through the path. She knew that feeling of fear, and decided that it wasn't worth it; last day or not.

For at least 15 minutes we coaxed, I left and sat in the teacher's driveway, my husband helped, and she fought and fought BIG.  The teacher was extremely patient giving words of encouragement, but also laced with a firm lead.  Until finally.  FINALLY.  She jumped with just a hint of my husband's hand leading her into the water from the diving board.  She immediately went to safe mode (her back), but her teacher gently rolled her to her belly so she could progress.  Progress to the finish.  Oh, she didn't want to. My girl didn't want to at all.  I saw it in her face.  But she kept going, thanks to the lead she got from her daddy and her teacher.

We got in the car and she was exhausted.  Throwing a fit like that will make a girl pretty tired if I do say so myself.  And since we had caught her in a little nap, I thought.  I had time to actually think.

Swimming lessons.

We are having these every single day.   We are either on the steps or on the diving board.

When things are safe…when we are in that shallow end splashing around and having a blast.  Going just far enough to make us feel like we are risking it, but then back again to Safetown.  In those times, we are good.  We are content,  Content loving our Teacher and serving Him.

It's the moments off the diving board that can really get us.  It can either make or break us.  You might be dealing with something new, or fighting with something that has been a constant battle in your life for years.  And the enemy keeps rearing its ugly head trying to get the best of you.  The moments where we look into the future and question everything we've ever said and ever done to get us where we are.  We are frightened.  The deep end is stinkin' scary.  We have been there before.  We know what if feels like, what it is like to feel like we are on the brink of drowning, complete failure.  Failure again.  Yes.  We know that.

We look into the deep waters and say to ourselves, "I won't do that again. I can't.  I know I've overcome things before, but this is different.  This is scary and uncomfortable.  I know the steps are on the other side, I know that I NEED to get there.  But there's no way I can do this, I can't embark on this journey AGAIN."

Here's the thing that I say with ALL of my heart to all of you, my dear friends.  It isn't only YOU versus the deep end; YOU versus the burdens and the battles you are facing.  It is you with GOD, "your refuge and strength, your ever present help in trouble" (Psalm 46:1), that are facing these hurdles head on.  That deep end? The diving board? Success at the end is possible to overcome and get to because your Teacher is in the pool.  The Lord is waiting on you to jump in so He can guide you to a victorious side.  HE will guide you, HE will turn you on your belly when you need to progress even more.  HE will give you that gentle touch to push you along.  It won't always be easy; you might be grasping for air.  But as you come up for a breath, and when you think you are almost defeated, if you TRUST in HIM to get you there, He will wonderfully, with the perfect touch, and with perfect timing, raise you up and give you another leg to stand on.

Oh my goodness friends.  Isn't He good?  His goodness and mercy and FAITHFULNESS is something that we can jump to every single day with the daily battles or the new ones that have hit us like a freight train without warning.

Trust HIM.  He has got you.  And the scary moments?  Keep trusting…He hasn't left you.  Even though it might feel that you are alone kicking and reaching your arms to the shallow end, coming up for air, you are not alone.  He is growing you; it might be uncomfortable growth, but He is watching you, helping you, as you grow and learn.  He has not abandoned you.  Call for Him and He will come to you at the exact right moment.  He's in the pool.  He's with you; with you as you and Him swim to the steps.

As Dory would say, "Keep on swimming."

SaveSave
SaveSave

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Why It's NOT Gloom and Doom

"What is this world coming to??"

"I sure hope Jesus comes back soon." 

"I'm not going to have kids (or any more kids) because I don't want them growing up in this world we live in."
"The world is going to hell in a hand basket."

"Lord, deliver us." 

"This is it...the end is here."

"What is this world coming to??"

"RUN FOR YOUR LIVES!!!"

These are just a few of the fleeting statements I have either thought myself or have heard very often in the last few years.  As a matter of fact, if we are being REALLY honest..which, we are, I thought one of these thoughts this morning after reading a news post on social media.

Is it really that bad 'out there'?? Well, I guess it depends on what you hear and what media source you're plugged into.  I will say, it often feels like it's getting far worse than it is getting better.  Though, sometimes I shock myself with my "I can't believe this is happening!!" attitude after whatever news story hits my feed.  After all, C.S. Lewis who I admire and respect, said, "Jesus Christ did NOT say,  Go into all the world and tell the world that it is quite right."

We LIVE in a fallen world.  We are fallen people living in a fallen world.  So, what are we to do?

 In 1 Peter 1:13, it says, "Therefore with minds that are alert and fully sober, set your hope on the grace to be brought to you when Jesus Christ is revealed at His coming."

One of the things we are to do is to be alert, watchful, fully sober, and ready for Jesus Christ to come.

However, we are not to be alert, be watchful, fully sober on our pretty little front porch while claiming all things gloom and doom as we watch the world and the people in it wither.

Nope.  Not today. Not any day.

Again, let's go with honesty (the truth will set you free, yes?).  I am not great at this.  I mean good grief, I already deal with the looming possibility of the anxiety breaker about to trip in my head on a daily basis.  I get worried sick, scared, fearful of what my kids will see and go through. I mentally write off all plane rides, trips, the ability for my kids to EVER have a phone in their hands, much less the internet, anyone who isn't in our inner circle and those I couldn't Facebook stalk comb through their social media sites before dealing with them.   I try to shelter them, myself, my family, and pretend that what is going on around me and in our communities, actually isn't.

I'm not sure you guys; that right there might be a scarier place to reside and place our heart if we really think about it.  Obviously, I agree that precautions need to be taken, but one (like myself) could go a little overboard when we have the instant ability to pick up our phones and read/watch the news in real time.

So, I have a question.  Jesus did not call us to a spirit of timidity, did He? Scared to death of what is to come?  So many verses from God's word tumble in when I think about how we, as Christians, are to be and to act in what seems like a chaotic and confusing time all around the nation and the world.  One in particular: "For the Spirit God did not make us timid, but gives us power, love, and self discipline." 2 Timothy 1:7

I recently watched pastor Todd White's testimony online.  If you haven't seen it, look it up on good ol' YouTube.  It is fascinating and incredibly encouraging.  During one part leading into his story, he quoted John 16:33; "I have told you these things, so that in me you may have peace.  In this world you will have trouble.  But take heart! I have OVERCOME the world."  After that verse was read, he asked the following question that made me step back a whole minute and grab my convicted heart off the ground.

He asked, "So, if He overcame it......why are we so threatened by it?"

Why are we threatened when we KNOW the end result? The end result is victory!  "The Lord Himself goes before you and will be with you; He will never leave or forsake you.  Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged." Deuteronomy 31:8  

He has not only seen it and knows it, He is IN it, friends!

We could all stay right here, call it a day, and know that when the next disturbing, upsetting, and destructive thing happens, we can say, "My Lord, He has victory; this world has already been overcome by Him!" Which is great within itself, right?

Even though this is where it seems this blog post should end, it doesn't.  I don't think we are to only know and believe that we have victory in every circumstance and just sit with that in relief.  SITTING with that fact in mind, is not the answer.

This is where it gets exciting.  These are the times that we, as Christians, should stand UP together and lock arms and show the world that we are ready to MOVE.  But not in flippant FB political rants, or verbal disgust and condemnation, but in LOVE.  TRUTH in LOVE.  I'm not here, put on this Earth, to condemn anyone.  That's not my job, nor do I want it to be my job.  There's one judge, and I'm not Him.  What I am here to do...what WE are here to do, is to be the hands and feet of Jesus.  I don't only want to believe the Gospel, I want to WALK the Gospel out.   I want the entire world to see us, Christians, and say, "If this is Jesus, I want it.  And I want to run as fast as I can to it." 

I challenge myself and you friends, don't let anyone leave your presence not knowing your love for The Lord and for His people.

"By this all people will know that you are my disciples, if you have love for one another."  John 13:35

Friends, instead of sitting and receiving the bad news, let us ACT and be the good news. 

I'll leave you with this last quote from St. Teresa of Avila that I think pretty much sums this whole thing up as we see our nation and the world as a Christian:

"Christ has no body now, but yours. 

No hands, no feet on Earth, but yours.  

Yours are the eyes through which he looks compassion on this world. 

Yours are the feet with which he walks to do good. 

Yours are the hands through which he blesses all the world. 

Yours are the hands, yours are the feet, yours are the eyes, you are His body. 

Christ has no body now on Earth but yours."

There is still a lot of good things happening on this beautiful planet that God created; go and find it.  And better yet, BE it.  

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Why I'm a Perfect and Rotten Parent

I was the ripe ol' age of 24 when I had my first child.  A boy.  A precious, dimple-cheeked little guy.  I'll never forget The Coach and I looking at each other in sheer and utter FEAR when it was just the three of us going home for the first time.  It was incredibly scary.  We were both afraid we were going to wreck the vehicle (even though we were going 10 miles under the speed limit), break him when we put him in or out of the carseat, change his diaper the wrong way, or maybe wrap him in too many or too less of blankets.  Was he too hot?  Or was he too cold??  It was scary, unknown, but so sweet all at once.  A trifecta of emotions! One thing I knew, is that I wanted to be THE best parent.  We both did. So, we set off into the sunset of parenthood.

And boy, did I rock it.  My kid was taking two naps a day; one at 10 a.m. and then at 2 p.m. for about 2 hours each stint.  I would relish over the fact that I had managed to be amazing at scheduling naps.  I remember walking into crowded grocery stores with my now bubbling and happy toddler son looking at other parents and their screaming mad children wondering why in the world they wouldn't stop and ask for my advice.  I would be so happy to give it to them.  I mean, hello?! Look at me!  All I have to do is say a sweet, quiet, yet stern 'no' and my two year old would listen.   There were even times I gave looks to other moms to signal for them to come to me. As if to say, "Look momma, quiet down your kid.  Don't you see my one and only precious little one?  All I have to do is give him the 'eye' and he calms down. It's really quite simple."   Heck, there were times I thought that I should crank out a book on my young, yet obviously expert parenting skills.

We would go to The Coach's baseball games and I would lay a blanket strategically behind me with a boyish themed mini-backpack that was packed with play dough, M&Ms, trucks, and crayons.  I would set them all in a half circle and put my sweet child right in the middle of the blanket.  Since I was SUCH a perfect parent, my kid would go from item to item playing quietly and sweetly as the 7 inning, two hour game rolled along.

Wow.  Wasn't I the best?

Fast forward six and a half years.

Six and a half years later almost to the day, I became the worst, most unskilled parent in the world in one fell swoop at approximately 2:17 a.m. one fall morning.

From obviously perfect to an obviously confused, never done this before, very hot mess.

My daughter came in this world ready to PARTY.  Her longest nap in 12 months was 45 minutes.  And might I add, they were all over the place.  I took her naps when and where I could get 'em.  We found out she had a dairy allergy about three weeks into her life and had to special order prescription formula every three months.  Our pediatrician's office and us went through an entire two days of trying to get her to actually take and like the formula while also not letting her get dehydrated.  Who knew that a three week old could muster up such WILL. The old working trick of driving in the car to let a child fall asleep actually made things worse; she screamed louder.  After four and a half years with her, I still get anxiety about going into the store because my 'no' with her looks AND feels drastically different than my 'no' with my boy.  I, most of the times, look like the parent that I used to stare upon with pity wondering how they got to where they were with their children. The momma that is running amuck trying to keep her cool through drops of sweat and fake smiles while her child screams her ever loving head off in the middle of an aisle.  Or at a baseball game.  Or at church.  Or wherever.  You name it.  I've been looked at the way I used to look at others. And let me tell you, I got what was comin' to me folks, and it's downright humbling (lesson learned).

All this being said, there are times I know a lot and sometimes I know nothing about parenting.  And it makes me absolutely crazy.  I often began to ask myself, "Do I really not know anything about this parenting gig? Am I really that horrible? Did I truly just luck out with my firstborn like my friends told me I had? Was the good day we had today with both, just luck?"

After all these months of racking my brain on what I was doing wrong, a game changing thought (or, how I would like to look at it, a word from God) occurred to me.

We aren't guaranteed a result.

I have known parents who are amazing, God fearing people, who have kids that have fallen off of the moral compass.  I have known people whose parents were physically absent from their lives and they have become amazing parents themselves, and it is awe inspiring.  I've seen families who have parents that have stayed happily married while their children go through the devastation of divorce.  Obviously, these things don't happen all the time, but that realization paired with my own two drastically different children made me realize that nothing I do is guaranteeing that the offspring that God has blessed me with will turn out to be what I want them to be.

I was identifying and judging myself as a parent by the way my kids acted.  I was either awesome or really not awesome.  There was no happy medium.  I realized after experiencing that type of roller coaster of emotion day in and day out, that this is just not a realistic way to rationalize my parenting.  We cannot identify ourselves by how our children turn out to be.  It just doesn't make sense.   When we think that way, we are putting ourselves as parents in a small and very limited box.  Do we not talk to our kids about reaching their full potential?  If we take our kids' actions and link them to our 'goodness' as a parent, how will we ever reach OUR potential as someone God-gave them in their life to help guide them and raise them into the adults that this world so desperately needs?

Here's the deal.  Parenting is tough.  I have grown all sorts of tough skin through the last 11 years of parenting, and I know I have a long way to go (if The Lord will so bless me with that).  I have cried in my closet, I have prayed for my kids until I have fallen asleep, I have yelled into pillows (or out loud) in sheer frustration, anger, or sadness.  But we cannot believe the King of Lies who wants to rob us of any joy we get out of parenting OR, on the same token, the lie that we don't have to work on it anymore because we are just THAT good and we've got it down pat.   The enemy wants to dig a wedge as deep as he can and break the family, the home, and anything good that is walking out of its door and into the world.  He desperately wants a foothold and when we begin to doubt ourselves, when we begin to think that the power lies within us, we begin to lose ground.  Not today, devil.  Not today.

Don't believe the lie.

So how do we measure ourselves as parents? I'm not quite sure and I'm not even sure we are to be measured.  What I AM sure of is this, I want God to be my right hand man.  I want my spouse to be my teammate where we lock arms and head into the fray, and I want to ask myself these questions:

Am I teaching my children what it means to love and follow The Lord Jesus Christ?
Am I loving them with all that I have and showing them that NOTHING they can ever do will change that? Not anything in this world?
Am I showing them the best I can the way the Lord loves them through me?
Am I giving my children up to The Lord daily and trusting Him to guide me in raising them?

That's all we can do.  We aren't guaranteed the result.  We go and parent the way God is guiding us, and we lift our hands and let Him, the One who knows, own the result.  The Lord is in control, He isn't surprised by any of it.  He knows their futures and their shortcomings.  Their heartaches, their hurts. He knows their talents, their gifts, their goals, and their fears.  After all, He made them.  We are just borrowing them for a while.  So, don't beat yourself up and give up, and don't praise yourself so greatly where we loosen up.  Let our failures guide us to become better, and the successes to help us remember that God gives us grace, mercy, and gorgeous glimpses of what our children are to one day become.

Parent On, my dear friends.

   

read more " Why I'm a Perfect and Rotten Parent "

Yet...

The Easter Story.

I have heard it many times.  I have heard it in church, in Sunday School, on movies, in the Bible. So many times have I heard that Jesus died and rose again for my sins so I can have everlasting life.  I knew what that meant.  I knew that I, because I have accepted the Lord Jesus as my Savior, that I am forgiven; because this man, this hero named Jesus of Nazareth, was Lord in the flesh, and for some reason, my poor pitiful self, was worth dying for.

Since a teenager, I have considered myself a Jesus girl.  A girl who loved and followed him, was in the Youth group, praise band, and in church on Wednesday nights.  I wavered.  Oh, did I waver, but He always found me and loved me back to the path that He created for me.  I promise you, without a doubt, I will still waver.  And He will still find me.  I love my God.  I love that He gives me a hope and a future that I couldn't ever have or create on my own.

It wasn't until later in life, however, that I began to really study and pay attention to the moments leading UP to the death and resurrection of Jesus.  As a matter of fact, it wasn't until I watched Lee Strobel's, The Case For Christ, listened deeply to our pastor Toby Slough and the word God gave him during the Easter season, did I start to understand the incredible and insurmountable situations that Jesus withstood for all humanity.  My faith, over time, has readily strengthened; I watched The Passion of the Christ, and other documentaries of Jesus in His last days, pulled my Bible out afterward and began to read over and over the moments that led up to, during, and followed Jesus' death.

It occurred to me shortly thereafter, that I actually have a favorite part of the Easter story.

I studied.  I listened.  And I found this.  Jesus praying in the Garden of Gethsemane, the night before He is crucified:

"Father, if you are willing, please take take this cup of suffering away from me.  Yet, I want your will to be done, not mine.  Then an angel appeared and strengthened him."  Luke 22:42-43

We can all agree so many poignant moments come from the death and resurrection of Jesus Christ.  Every verse stirs so much emotion in my soul.  But these two verses from Luke sends chills down my spine without fail every time I read it. Every. Single. Time.

Jesus, so filled with anguish, asks the Lord...is there any other way?  Any? And then the word, YET.  One powerful three letter word that is a stop sign to the questions.  YET.  Yet, I will still follow and submit to your plan, God.

He knows it is coming.  He nows how painful it will be.  He knows He is going to suffer, and suffer greatly.  He is perfect.  He is without sin.  Yet He knows He is going to endure hours of interrogation, mocking, brutal whipping, and die a horrible and awful death that every single sinner on the face of the Earth deserves.  Jesus is filled with such stress that He sweats drops of blood from his brow.   This is not a man who says, 'well, here it goes...time to die for all humanity. Part of the gig".  No, this is a perfect man who is 33 years old and knows that great punishment and incredible and massive physical pain is coming to Him without even a chance to get proven before He dies.

Being someone who has a tendency (understatement) to get anxious before big events, this is major to me and makes such a huge impact on my life.  The idea that pain is impending, it is coming, it is not going away, and still submitting to God's will no matter the cost; I truly cannot find the words for that.  I really cannot and if you know me, I am rarely speechless.  It is emotionally overwhelming for me. This, my friends, is THE ultimate and extreme example of being in the will of God; and all of this for me, us, humanity.  Sinners.

And the next part? Luke 22:43:

"Then an angel appeared and strengthened him."  

Jesus follows the plan, He follows the script, and an angel appears and strengthens Him.  

Isn't that right? Isn't that the TRUTH?  God sets out a path for us.  He has great plans that He has created for you and I since we were first born out of our mother's womb.  He calls us to great things that we couldn't ever imagine in our own simple minds.  We are called to do work for the Kingdom.  Following that plan and that path can get hard.  It can get dicey.  And at times, it can go against the grain of what the world says is the right and safe thing to do.  It can feel out of the ordinary, rare, solitary, and put you in a position where family and friends ask, "What in the world are you doing?".  But don't you know, that when we follow God, He will come down and strengthen you for the path that He has created?

You bet your bottom dollar He will!! Yes He will!  Don't you dare doubt it for a second.  When you follow His will, His plan for you life, oh yes, my fearless friend, He WILL strengthen you for that.  He will make a way for you as you step out into Him and into what may feel like darkness, the unknown, and the road that looks barren and scary.  He will bless your socks off.  Oh yes, darling, He will.

Jesus is Lord, but He was also human.  The only perfect human that has or will ever walk the face of this planet.  I tell you this because He knows.  He walked straight into death.  He suffered.  But YET, the Lord's promises prevailed.  He rose from the dead, perfect and beautiful, and saved us all who believe from the gates of Hell.  Can I get a hallelujah?  HALLELUJAH for the Cross.

This Easter will come and go like it usually does, but let this one be different. I encourage you to search for His will for you; follow it at whatever stage of life you are in.  What is He calling you to step out and do?  It might not be something that you have envisioned at this time in your life, but YET, let Him guide you.  For in Him, there are no losses.  The are no failures.  With Him, there are no 'OOPS'.  We know the ending of the story, friends.  With Jesus, there is only victory.  He died, He rose, and has given us the gift of eternal LIFE.

YET Lord, let your will be done.  Not mine.


Love,
Ashley

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The Middle

Middle child.  Middle School.  MID-life crisis.  In the 'middle' of friends' arguments.

I don't know about you, but I really can't recall many GOOD memories or experiences that come with the middle; unless, of course, it has something to do with the middle of an Oreo.  In that case, the middle is actually incredibly good.

We are filled with excitement in seeing someone's new start. The opportunity of the future and all the adventures that come ahead.  We are inspired to see someone's magnificent end.  The product of hard work and commitment, the success that has come to fruition, or even...a life wonderfully well lived.

Most of the time, the human race, our society, and each of us, only see the hopeful beginnings or the strong finishes.

But what about that middle?  What about when we are in the hallway? In between the opened door and the finishing tape?  The parts where we see absolutely no results, just hard work.  Case in point:  the middle of this blog post while the little girl climbs all over me with her feet on my shoulders and hands in my face..  Forgive the typos.

Speaking of, I feel like we are in the middle with her.  We celebrated her wonderful birth and were filled with hope of a little girl.   We know we want her to be a Proverbs 31 woman who has the beauty of a Christ filled heart; we have high hopes for her future and what her goals might end up being.
And you guys, right now, this middle with her is downright hard.  Tantrum throwing, strong willed-ness (I just learned that you could wipe sharpie off a countertop with nail polish remover), and 'her way or the highway' personality.

I also feel we are in the middle with our boy as well.  We celebrated his wonderful birth and were filled with hope of a little boy..and our first child.  We know that we want him to be a Christ following man who knows how treat a lady, how to be a great father, and fulfill his dreams.  And right now we are in the middle with him as well; helping him develop good study habits, learning hard lessons on life, guiding him as we have embarked on changing schools.  The good...and hard stuff.

In the middle.

And don't ya' know, the devil will come right up in your middle and tell you to quit.  That there is no way it could get better and most definitely not end well.  He will tell us how foolish we are for hoping and will tell you to curl up in a ball and hide until this all finishes up for you, because you surely cannot handle this right.  You will mess it up and regret that you even started for the silly goal that you had in front of you in the first place.

That can't be right. No.  This cannot be what God wants from our middles.  Strong beginnings and finishes are awesome. But He surely doesn't want us to wither like a flower in the middle, turn around and go in the other direction, sit and cry in that dark hallway.  As a matter of fact, we wouldn't have those strong finishes without good, solid, dig down deep, Spirit filled middles.  And I don't mean happy middles.  I mean, putting one foot in front of the other not knowing what the future holds but going on in anyway with a blindfold type of middles.

I heard a song the other day that I have heard many times; in church, on the radio, and such, but for some reason it was loud in my ears and in my head.  Loud to the point where it gave me goosebumps and an intently listening mindset.  I listened to the song at least 5 times in a row with the same Spirit filled conviction of what these middles really mean.  It is a song by Jesus Culture: Waiting Here for You.

Waiting here for you.  WAITING.  Not only is the middle the time we need to persevere, but it is a time where we WAIT.  Wait on God's glory, mercy, timing, deliverance.  Whatever it might be...waiting.  

Waiting HERE...not quitting and going/doing somewhere/something else.  Waiting HERE.  Not changing your environment just to divert and avoid the middle. Waiting here...for HIM to remind us of His promises and His faithfulness. 

The Bible says this:  

"The Lord is good to those who wait for Him, to the soul who seeks Him." - Lamentations 3:25 

"Wait for the Lord, be strong, and let your heart take courage; wait for the Lord." - Psalm 27:14 

"And I am sure of this, that He who began a good work in you, will bring it to completion at the day of Jesus Christ." - Philippians 1:6 

Whatever kind of middle you might be facing.  I feel it.  I feel the desire to stop in your tracks and say, "It's too hard!".  Trust me.  There are times I would LOVE to run to my bed and say, "I'm done."  To say that it's too hard to even take one more step forward.  But, I think that's the point.  Our decision on this middle will either strengthen our faith or find us running from it instead.  It's free will, folks.   

I choose not to say, "this too shall pass".  No.  I don't want to just wait for it to end.  Or to close my eyes and just hope for the best.  No.  I want to say, TAKE COURAGE.  Be strong.  And know that this middle is part of the beauty and the glory of God that makes the ending so wonderful.  I choose to praise Him while I wait, even though I am not sure of the path or the ending.

Guys, He will see you through this middle.  He has to! As I preach to myself, I say, don't doubt the middle!  Don't doubt what God might be doing because, as it says, He will bring IT to completion.  He has plans...big plans, so we, in the middle must pray BIG and BOLD prayers. We don't know the end, we only see the hard work, but He and His plans WILL prevail.

The Middle.  It's where He builds great things.

Much love,
Ashley

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The MOVE

Well, the time has come!

This past week has been PACKED (no pun intended) with packing...unpacking...throwing trash away...giving things away...packing..unpacking...breaking down boxes...putting boxes up....packing.

Let me be honest, we have moved several times.  As a matter of fact, a friend of mine asked me recently, "Is this the 4th place your littlest one will live?" I sat for a second and thought....No, no way. But, YES, yes it will be.  To give you a little perspective, she is not 4 yet.

Now before you think we are 'hoppers', we haven't changed jobs THAT many times in her little life, but, we have moved quite a few times. Why? One reason is because we wait for the perfect place to raise a family, and in those waiting times, we live in temporary places. We take our time, because to us, that is a vital part to raising a family. We should be expert movers by now, right?  Yeah, not so much! Each move proves to be so different than the other!

The biggest reason we move is because of the coaching world.  We have done two things and have learned from both.  In our 12 years of being part of this coaching community, we have lived SUPER close and we also have lived somewhat 'far' away.  Can you live further away, commute, and still be a super supportive coach's wife?  Of course!!  But from experience, when your husband's season gets going, you will either pack for the entire day and 'wait it out' to support him at his games, OR be able to go home, regroup, have the kids do homework, get a little snack, etc.  To be married to a coach is to be part of a huge, wonderful family.  Being able to support him, have fellowship with the other coach's wives, support the team, cheer them on...all those things are big deals.

So, with this new change and exciting opportunity, we are moving to be close so we can embrace and support the school we will now be a part of!

This time around it seemed like we had so much MORE than ever before!  We did some major purging and 'down-sizing our stuff', which was incredible to do.  Even a little therapeutic!

In the end, we ended up with a gazillion boxes (I never seemed to get enough of those suckers - always went back to the store for more), pounds of trash, many things to give away, a few little mishaps (yes, I fell on a chair box trying to get clothes OUT.  It was not pretty, folks.  Not pretty at all), and then a beautiful home to leave for the new owners!

And then, before we knew it.  That was that.  We went to the title company, closed on our house, and went to our new 'spot' until we make final decisions on our next phase!  

Were we sad?  Yes.  You see that spot in the middle of the wood floor? In front of the fireplace? The 4 of us gathered there to pray.  We prayed in THANKS and gratefulness for the roof that God provided faithfully over our heads.  We prayed in gratefulness for the people that surrounded us on all sides.  We prayed and asked that God would abundantly BLESS the home for the new owners. We prayed for all the scripture that is written by us in sharpie deep inside the walls, on the frame of that house, would do exactly as is written.  Blessings.  Gatherings.  Fellowship.  Protection.  We prayed for our family, our adventure, and where it takes us next.  I cried.  BUT, I left with hopeful anticipation and expectation of what God will bring.  

A lot of folks have asked how our kiddos are doing.   I always respond with this:  A wonderful coach's wife, Robin, told me once when I asked about how she dealt with moving many times, and she said, "You treat it like an adventure!  You tell your kids how neat it will be to make new friends, new teachers, and a new house!  It will be so fun!".  There ya' go.  One of the best pieces of advice I have ever gotten.  My boy was just a few months old when I asked her and when she told me that and I hang on to that advice and that IS what I'll do! So...to answer that question...the kiddos are so excited! 

There are a TON of unknowns.  And it makes me a tad fearful at times. 

But, then again, it also makes me incredibly excited.  To know that HE is in control and knows what is ahead for us? And WILL provide for us and give us exciting opportunities?? How can you not get excited about THAT!!  

We are in our new 'pad' now; settled in, and ready to move FORWARD.  Not looking back, but reflecting on the precious times and knowing that MORE memories will be made.  They are being made right now.  

And, thanks to a neighbor in our 'old' neighborhood, our new place is oozing 'cozy, sweet home' from that delicious candle she gave me.  Something as little as a beautiful candle can make a huge difference in this coach's wife's heart! 

Home is what you make it...is it not?  This move has already taught me so much.  We will continue on this adventure with hopeful hearts and excited attitudes!  One chapter closes and another one begins!  Thank you, Lord.  

And yes, that may or may not be M&Ms sitting on the counter.  Don't judge.  

read more " The MOVE "

Lightning Bugs and Summer Nights

The night sky made its appearance as we all sat in the pool chairs at my parents'  house, and my dad said to us, "Did you see that lightning bug?"  Sure did.  That little guy, being the first one I saw as dusk settled in, reminded me what it was like to chase lightning bugs. The way your eyes have to strain in the night to see the faint light of these little creatures who seem to never be in the same spot twice.  The way you would run around like crazy with a mesh bug catcher in hand trying to snatch those things!  You were always happy to catch just one.

My little loves' faces were so excited to catch some lightning bugs as it grew darker and darker.  My mom provided a plastic cup with a lid and we went a-runnin'.  The Coach caught one and right then and there, our hunt was complete! It's funny to see the differences in your kids' personalities, isn't it?  While my girl wanted to keep it trapped inside the plastic cup (poor thing had no 'vent' to breathe)
and put it by the nightstand all night, my boy, after enjoying the catch, was desperately wanting to release it.  

After my littles were in bed and the house was quiet, I sat there remembering all the times and nights outside watching lightning bugs and being in that house. Being at my parents' house is always nostalgic. Because we live so far away, when we come to visit, we stay for a while and I always have time to travel down memory lane.  I remember so many summer nights there.  Summer days.  School days.  Holidays...

I remember a Christmas party upstairs with my high school friends and we laughed and laughed while we exchanged presents and ate snacks.
I remember the sound of lawns being mowed on Saturday mornings waking me up, but loving the sound of people taking care of their home.
I remember driving in the driveway after getting a speeding ticket and being so scared to tell my parents.
I remember watching countless movies with my best friend, having sleepovers, and staying up as late as we could.
Speaking of staying up late, I remember writing a research paper on the book The Joy Luck Club all in one night and got one hour of sleep before the next day in school (I made a 95 on that paper, by the way - procrastination might just work).
I remember my mom waking me up for school and knowing she would wait downstairs to hear the shower come on - her cue to know I was 'up'
...and I would turn it on...but I would go back to sleep until the absolute last minute I could (Sorry mom for those water bills!).
I remember loving it when my two older sisters and their kids were there, either for the day, or overnight.

So many memories.  But then, I realized, these are just my teenage memories.  What about the memories of the childhood house?  I began listing those memories out visually in my head, too.   My sisters babysitting me, my younger brother being brought home from the hospital, watching my mom cook, the tire swing, the ditch we would play in, the trampoline with (GASP!) NO net.  

I looked around and thought about what I would do if my parents ever moved and I didn't have to drive to that house anymore.  It honestly made me sad.  But then, I stopped.  I thought.  I pondered.  I loved the homes I had memories in.  I loved the walls that surrounded me.  But that house would be nothing if it weren't for the people who were inside.  It truly isn't WHERE the catching of lightning bugs and summer nights happen;  it's about WHO it happens with.

My parents, my siblings.  We are NOT perfect.  We are flawed.  We have issues just as good as the next person. BUT, THEY are the childhood memories.  They created the lightning bugs and summer nights.

I went down the hallway, checked on my littles and watched them sleep for a bit, and I began to pray. I prayed, especially since we have our own move coming our way, that Coach and I would be the memories for them.  That they will be the memories for each other.  My prayer is that when they go and catch lightning bugs again, whether it be with each other, with us, or with their own families one day, that they will remember.  And they will remember fondly of the place, but even more so, their heart will be full thinking of the who they were with.

Here's to more lightning bugs.

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Jesus, My Captain & A Printable

Yes, I know.  Those don't make sense together; or at least, they don't seem like they belong together.

BUT.  No fear, my friends.  I shall connect the two!

First, I love music.  All kinds.  There is rarely a type of music I don't like.

Second, I also love cute printables to hang around the house in frames, in my kids' bathrooms/bedrooms, etc.  I have a rotating frame that sits in my kitchen and a drawer underneath that holds printables for all seasons; birthdays, spring, fall, you name it.  Needless to say, that stack keeps growing and it makes my heart happy, happy!

And third, I love really good sermons.  You know, the ones that resonate so deep in your soul that you know for a 100 percent fact that the preacher was speaking straight to your face and you felt as if you were the only there getting a personally spoken to word from God!

We listened to one of those sermons this past Sunday.  Coach and I were on the road and decided to play this sermon from our church and I tell you, it was all I can do not to scream AAA-MEN and start boo-hooing all at the same time.  This pastor, straight from Nashville (as a Tennessee born and bred girl, that made me perk up right there), is taking his family through a move and a BIG change and joining the church.  A change that seems a little crazy.  As he began to preach, I said to God and to Coach, "wow...WOW.  this is us.  THIS is how we have felt and are feeling".  Everything he said resonated with us so much that it was as if he was having church JUST for us.  (if you don't know about our upcoming move and changes, click here: We Interrupt This Program ).

Here is the link to watch and or listen.  I encourage you, if you are going through ANY changes at all...any kind of "what am I (we) doing?", or asking "what is GOD doing in my life?", or even, "this seems ridiculously crazy for me to believe or to go for..." This will be the best 20ish minutes you will have today.  Gosh, even if you are struggling with a decision to make or an opportunity that you aren't sure is from God.  I'm telling you.  You will not regret listening to this.  You can even fast forward a little bit to see it to get to the message; it starts at about the 11 minute mark.  You will love it; I know you will.

Watch/Listen to it HERE: http://crosstimberschurch.org/watch/

The pastor mentioned a song; and being a Nashville guy, he has a love for music (yay!), so again, I was all ears.  This song was CAPTAIN by Hillsong.  After the sermon was over, we downloaded it immediately.  Now, this time, I did cry.  One of those silent cries because tears are flowing uncontrollably.  As we go through this season of change, and knowing this is not the only time that change will come, these lyrics are an incredible testament to God's all knowing, almighty power and guidance.  Some of the lyrics...

Through waters uncharted, my soul will embark.  

I'll follow Your voice straight into the dark.  

And if from the course, You intend I depart.  Speak to the sails of my wandering heart.  

Like the wind, You'll guide, clear the skies before me  And I'll glide this open sea.  

Like the stars Your word will align my voyage, and remind me where I've been and where I am going.  

Now, on to the printable...I love seeing words that I feel I need over and over.  The words to remind me who is in control and who is my Captain and knowing where I have been and He knowing where I am going.  Because of this love of impactful words, I have made a printable! Annnnnd... one for YOU to print off, too! And I made it set for this SUMMER season in mind.

Here it is in my frame in the kitchen and the printable itself:

I think I like it!  Of course, there are always things that I would like to change, but the purpose is served.  He is OUR CAPTAIN, our soul's trusted Lord.  He is the one who sustains us.  Let Him guide our sails into where He needs to take it.  

HERE IS THE PRINTABLE FOR YOU TO DOWNLOAD AND PRINT:

JESUS MY CAPTAIN

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We Interrupt This Program...

There is one thing that would probably be good for you to understand about me before even beginning to read this post;  I loathe change.  Unless it is an obvious "good thing" in MY simple human mind for me personally, I hate change (controlling, much??).  I was the little girl who threw a massive, flyin' off the handle fit when her parents told her she was going to a neighbor's house to swim but on the way surprised her to a trip to a fun theme park.  I was the one who made schedules for the summer days when in first grade and ANY change in the plan ruined my attitude and the day itself.  That girl when my mom told me they were thinking of going to the beach for Christmas, I cried for hours.  All because I didn't want the change.  Predictability, normalcy, schedules; it's what I like.  Learning to bend gracefully has been a hard and tough thing for me, but I'm getting there; little by little, I'm getting better. On top of this, what I'm also learning, is that God stretches you in areas you NEED to be stretched! EXPECT that to happen!

Enter... "The Call".  

When my husband got 'the call', I politely, sweetly, yet loudly firmly, said, without skipping a beat, "Well, that's so nice.  But you can go ahead and tell him no, honey".  You see, this call was a job opportunity, and as many people well know...when you marry a coach, you also marry the opportunity and chance to make moves a little bit more than your average 8 to 5, Monday through Friday worker.  This was one of those opportunities that makes your heart pitter patter a bit but then the raging wave of FEAR comes over you like a monsoon!  And, then you have to ask, is this something God really wants for us right now?  What is this interruption, and most important, why?? We were settled, happy, at a school that our kids loved and had only been to and known, and surrounded by people who invested in us and we happily returned that investment to them.

My husband challenged me/us to truly pray about and listen to see what God wanted us to do with this little 'opportunity' (I thought, wow, he's still considering it?).  Well, fantastic.  NOW what.  To say I was a little frustrated was an understatement.  Even though I was a 34 year old woman, wife, and mother, keeping it all together on the outside,  inside I envisioned myself stomping my feet and pouting just like I did when I was young when things changed.  I had several pity parties in the days to come.

However,  I took my husband up on the challenge and reluctantly began to pray knowing that when He would speak, I would need to listen and follow.  I had to fight against the feelings of being afraid of what The Lord would say.  Have you ever felt like that? That if you don't pray and go about your own plan, then surely things will stay fine? And if you do pray, things might possibly get out of control and you won't be able to have your say in it? I have.  And I, unfortunately have chosen NOT to pray in some past instances for fear of what The Lord might show me.

I knew the stakes were high, so I prayed insistently and every moment I could for God to give me an answer. I prayed in the morning and at night and in between when the situation came to mind.  I read about how to know if it is God you are hearing or if it isn't.  I posted this verse and this saying up where I could see it when I left the house and when I came into the house.

And little by little, bit by bit, I began to trust HIM more and pray more and specifically ask for not my ways but for His to prevail...

And folks, I tell you.  When I surrendered to His will and prayerfully asked Him to move and show us clearly, God opened door after door after door.  Moment after moment after moment.  Moments where I would be together with my Coach and we would just look at each other in awe of what we just saw or heard.  Little things and moments where I was by myself and just an impression would be placed on my heart.   The things that were coming out of our boy's mouth in talking about faith, and being together as a family (he, at the time, was not in the 'know' about what his parents were currently praying for or the decision at hand).  Sermons that were on being BRAVE, COURAGEOUS, getting out of your comfort zone, and expanding your work for the Kingdom.  Books I read suddenly became obviously pointed to the circumstance.  One quote in particular came from Life Interrupted by Priscilla Shirer: 

"Hold your own plans loosely and stay ready to submit to His.  Consider them to be more important, more desirable than anything you could dream up on your own.  He has come down to you with intentionality and purpose because He loves you and know that you are never more securer than when you're in His will." 

Hold your own plans loosely.  Have I ever done that?  Nope.  So, why now?  

Because His purpose has GOT to be greater than my own thought up ideas, schedules, and normalcy. And then, when we both needed it most, my prayers changed.  Instead of praying for ME to get an answer, I began to earnestly pray for my husband, the spiritual leader of our family, to get an answer and then...it happened.  

We both got home on a Tuesday night, after praying for a few weeks, emotionally exhausted and we both looked at each other and almost said simultaneously, "We're taking it." (and it's 'we're' because in this coaching business, it's always and has to be WE). 

When it came down to it, our only two reasons we could come up with for saying 'no' was because of our comfort level and the fear of failure.  Those were the only two things we mustered up.  Two not very good reasons at all and definitely two reasons that were not of the Lord.  One verse I came up on while spending time studying these 'life interruptions' was: 

And what I learned from this and the wise words of Priscilla Shirer, as followers of Christ, we are not of people who 'shrink back', we are to "follow God wherever He leads, no matter the cost".  

So, here we go.  Making really big changes; moving locations, switching doctors (that's a huge deal to me!), saying goodbyes and meeting a whole new set of people that we believe God has ordained for us to meet. Who knows where this path will lead. The goodbyes are tough and hard, especially when you feel you are all but blood related with the people you have done life with.  And truly, it's not goodbye, but it is a change of pace with them.  I don't expect this move to be easy, there are lots of things that are still needing to find their place in the puzzle, but I DO believe that The Lord has great things in store.  God has prepared our hearts and souls and we are excited for what is to come and for the families we get to meet.  We are excited to see God move and are ready to embark on this new chapter!  The icing on the cake? I get to watch my husband build a program and do what he does BEST.  

As Shirer would say: This interruption? A Divine Intervention.  

read more " We Interrupt This Program... "