There is one thing that would probably be good for you to understand about me before even beginning to read this post; I loathe change. Unless it is an obvious "good thing" in MY simple human mind for me personally, I hate change (controlling, much??). I was the little girl who threw a massive, flyin' off the handle fit when her parents told her she was going to a neighbor's house to swim but on the way surprised her to a trip to a fun theme park. I was the one who made schedules for the summer days when in first grade and ANY change in the plan ruined my attitude and the day itself. That girl when my mom told me they were thinking of going to the beach for Christmas, I cried for hours. All because I didn't want the change. Predictability, normalcy, schedules; it's what I like. Learning to bend gracefully has been a hard and tough thing for me, but I'm getting there; little by little, I'm getting better. On top of this, what I'm also learning, is that God stretches you in areas you NEED to be stretched! EXPECT that to happen!
Enter... "The Call".
When my husband got 'the call', I politely, sweetly, yet
loudly firmly, said, without skipping a beat, "Well, that's so nice. But you can go ahead and tell him no, honey". You see, this call was a job opportunity, and as many people well know...when you marry a coach, you also marry the opportunity and chance to make moves a little bit more than your average 8 to 5, Monday through Friday worker. This was one of those opportunities that makes your heart pitter patter a bit but then the raging wave of FEAR comes over you like a monsoon! And, then you have to ask, is this something God really wants for us right now? What is this interruption, and most important, why?? We were settled, happy, at a school that our kids loved and had only been to and known, and surrounded by people who invested in us and we happily returned that investment to them.
My husband challenged me/us to truly pray about and listen to see what God wanted us to do with this little 'opportunity' (I thought, wow, he's still considering it?). Well, fantastic. NOW what. To say I was a little frustrated was an understatement. Even though I was a 34 year old woman, wife, and mother, keeping it all together on the outside, inside I envisioned myself stomping my feet and pouting just like I did when I was young when things changed. I had several pity parties in the days to come.
However, I took my husband up on the challenge and reluctantly began to pray knowing that when He would speak, I would need to listen and follow. I had to fight against the feelings of being afraid of what The Lord would say. Have you ever felt like that? That if you don't pray and go about your own plan, then surely things will stay fine? And if you do pray, things might possibly get out of control and you won't be able to have your say in it? I have. And I, unfortunately have chosen NOT to pray in some past instances for fear of what The Lord might show me.
I knew the stakes were high, so I prayed insistently and every moment I could for God to give me an answer. I prayed in the morning and at night and in between when the situation came to mind. I read about how to know if it is God you are hearing or if it isn't. I posted this verse and this saying up where I could see it when I left the house and when I came into the house.
And little by little, bit by bit, I began to trust HIM more and pray more and specifically ask for not my ways but for His to prevail...
And folks, I tell you. When I surrendered to His will and prayerfully asked Him to move and show us clearly, God opened door after door after door. Moment after moment after moment. Moments where I would be together with my Coach and we would just look at each other in awe of what we just saw or heard. Little things and moments where I was by myself and just an impression would be placed on my heart. The things that were coming out of our boy's mouth in talking about faith, and being together as a family (he, at the time, was not in the 'know' about what his parents were currently praying for or the decision at hand). Sermons that were on being BRAVE, COURAGEOUS, getting out of your comfort zone, and expanding your work for the Kingdom. Books I read suddenly became obviously pointed to the circumstance. One quote in particular came from Life Interrupted by Priscilla Shirer:
"Hold your own plans loosely and stay ready to submit to His. Consider them to be more important, more desirable than anything you could dream up on your own. He has come down to you with intentionality and purpose because He loves you and know that you are never more securer than when you're in His will."
Hold your own plans loosely. Have I ever done that? Nope. So, why now?
Because His purpose has GOT to be greater than my own thought up ideas, schedules, and normalcy. And then, when we both needed it most, my prayers changed. Instead of praying for ME to get an answer, I began to earnestly pray for my husband, the spiritual leader of our family, to get an answer and then...it happened.
We both got home on a Tuesday night, after praying for a few weeks, emotionally exhausted and we both looked at each other and almost said simultaneously, "We're taking it." (and it's 'we're' because in this coaching business, it's always and has to be WE).
When it came down to it, our only two reasons we could come up with for saying 'no' was because of our comfort level and the fear of failure. Those were the only two things we mustered up. Two not very good reasons at all and definitely two reasons that were not of the Lord. One verse I came up on while spending time studying these 'life interruptions' was:
And what I learned from this and the wise words of Priscilla Shirer, as followers of Christ, we are not of people who 'shrink back', we are to "follow God wherever He leads, no matter the cost".
So, here we go. Making really big changes; moving locations, switching doctors (that's a huge deal to me!), saying goodbyes and meeting a whole new set of people that we believe God has ordained for us to meet. Who knows where this path will lead. The goodbyes are tough and hard, especially when you feel you are all but blood related with the people you have done life with. And truly, it's not goodbye, but it is a change of pace with them. I don't expect this move to be easy, there are lots of things that are still needing to find their place in the puzzle, but I DO believe that The Lord has great things in store. God has prepared our hearts and souls and we are excited for what is to come and for the families we get to meet. We are excited to see God move and are ready to embark on this new chapter! The icing on the cake? I get to watch my husband build a program and do what he does BEST.
As Shirer would say: This interruption? A Divine Intervention.
